2B from Nier Automata is trying to teach me the 48 Laws of Power and I'm sitting here like, my guy, my brain is not absorbing Robert Greene right now because she's got her tits out. That's the whole game. It's a visual novel, right, 2d hentai style, and the premise is absolutely unhinged. She's supposed to be boosting your social skills but every "lesson" just devolves into her getting railed in different positions. The humor is so dry I actually snorted. One minute she's quoting some law about never outshining the master, the next her panties are gone and the dialogue box is just "oh... oh yes..."

I kept clicking through because the art is actually pretty crisp for a browser game, nice thick lines on her body. The sex scenes are explicit, full on cumshots, her android ass getting pounded, moaning text everywhere. But here's the thing. I completely forgot what law number three was. Something about concealing your intentions. She was saying it while unzipping his pants and I retained zero information. Maybe that's the point? The game calls itself educational but it's a porn parody, a total goon fuel app. There's no deep mechanic, just click and watch 2B get destroyed. The no AI tag makes sense, you can tell a human drew this with love and a complete disregard for the source material's dignity.

I wanted to hate it but then she said "law number six: court attention at all costs" and proceeded to deepthroat and I laughed. It's so stupid. The writing flips between pseudo-intellectual quotes and the filthiest dirty talk, no warning. Oh and the music is just some generic lo-fi loop that keeps playing even during the hardcore scenes, which makes it weirder. My only real complaint is the text sometimes advances too fast if you click by accident and you miss some ridiculous line about power dynamics while someone's getting a facial. There's no backlog button. I think. I was distracted. What was I saying? Right, 2B teaching social skills. Don't play this to learn anything except maybe how not to write a parody. But if you want to see her in compromising positions while spouting Greene's philosophy, knock yourself out. I'm not sure if I feel smarter or dumber. Probably dumber.