The first thing that hits you is how ugly it is. Like, deliberately. The corridors are just grey boxes and the text looks like it was typed in notepad during a lunch break. But then you click around and find a room where a woman is chained to some kind of flesh pillar and the writing suddenly gets very specific about what the hooks are doing to her skin. I forgot to mention this is a Hellraiser parody. Dickraiser. The name alone.

You play as Kirsty, I think, wandering this maze of horny cenobites. Except they're not really cenobites, more like guys in leather with comically large... well. The game calls them "dicks" but the art is so crude it's more like someone glued a traffic cone to a stick figure. There's this one scene where you stumble into an orgy room and the text describes a monster with chains for hands doing things that would make Pinhead blush. Or maybe not, Pinhead probably invented half this stuff. The choice system is weird, sometimes clicking the same option gives you a different result, like the game can't make up its mind. I spent way too long trying to get the "bad ending" the description mentions, the one where Kirsty gets turned into some kind of living furniture. The text for that ending is actually disturbing in a way the rest of the game isn't, it describes her skin being stretched and pinned and she's still aware the whole time. Then the next ending I got was just a guy in a gimp suit saying "nice" and the screen goes black. The tonal whiplash is real.

The real model tag confuses me because nothing here looks real, it's all scribbled hentai drawings that might have been scanned from a napkin. But the domination stuff works, there's this one sequence where you have to choose between submitting to a female cenobite or trying to run, and the submission path has this whole text adventure thing where she describes exactly what she's going to peel off your body. I kept reloading to read it again. The game doesn't explain half its mechanics, there's apparently multiple endings but no way to track them, and the instruction button just dumps the entire Hellraiser plot on you like a wikipedia article. I still don't know what the puzzle box does in this version but I found a scene where it's being used in a way that would make Clive Barker file a restraining order.