I can't stop thinking about the reload animation. Everything else is a blur of jiggling polygons and muzzle flash but the way the gun kicks back, just slightly to the left, feels like the most honest thing in the entire experience. My therapist would probably say I'm fixating on the recoil because it's the only predictable stimulus in a sensory avalanche of aggressively bouncy breasts and laser fire. She's not wrong. The whole thing is a first person shooter where you're on a spaceship and the enemies are topless women who materialize and you click on them until they vanish. It's basically a stress test for your wrist and your ability to ignore the fact that the boss girl has a health bar that depletes with all the urgency of a government bureaucracy.

The "plot" is that you're on a ship and you shoot. That's it. The description says you get rewards for your hard work and I guess that means the static image of a woman in a suggestive pose that pops up after you drain the boss's absurdly long life meter. I spent more time clicking on the boss than I did on any other activity this week and I work in data entry so that's saying something. The aiming is loose, like the mouse is drunk, and sometimes a babe will spawn directly in your face which is a jump scare I didn't know I was signing up for. The scifi setting is just a jpeg of a corridor. I wish the walls had more detail. They won't.

The big tits are there, obviously, doing their floaty physics thing, and the POV perspective makes it feel like you're a camera on a stick. It's not sexy. It's like a shooting gallery at a carnival that got raided by the vice squad. I kept playing though. The loop of pop-up target, click, next target is weirdly sticky even when the framerate chugs for no reason. Maybe that's the real reward. Not the images. The small, broken rhythm of a thing that almost works.